God Doesn’t Hate You

A MESSAGE TO THOSE WHO HAVE HAD AN ABORTION

1 Corinthians 13 explains that,“If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.”¹ No matter how much truth is told, if there is no love alongside it, then it has no meaning. Jesus demonstrated how to speak to people who were weighed down by their own sin with equal parts truth and love.

In John 4, a woman at the well was met with difficult, convicting truth when she met Jesus, but He did not start speaking to her about her sin. He started their controversial conversation by asking her for a drink, which demonstrated that He did not judge her for being a Samaritan woman. Jews were not supposed to associate with Gentiles for fear of becoming “dirty,” but Jesus had other intentions in mind.

He wanted to give her true life through Himself. Even when her sin of being an adulterous woman with five husbands was laid bare, He did not say what He did to condemn her. He said what He did to show her that though he knew all she had done, He still loved her.

He told her of a never-ending, fully-satisfying, life-giving gift that she could have if she only believed. You can have this too, a rich relationship with the Creator of the universe that entails all things good: love, joy, peace, strength, power over sin and circumstance, and so much more. God made a way to redeem humanity back to Him once and for all through His son Jesus, no matter how much Satan and sin interferes now.

An abortion is a gruesome experience, one that involves more than most people care to admit. Planned Parenthood claims on their site that there are no “bad” reasons for getting an abortion, but then why does the aftermath bring so much emotional turmoil for many women?²

Mayo Clinic lists the general physical risks and consequences of having an abortion, but they do not go into great depth of how it affects women emotionally.³ Life Clinic, on the other hand, explains that women may initially feel relief after the procedure, though they later may experience mild to severe regret, guilt, shame, anger, anxiety, and depression that can also lead to eating disorders.⁴

The common narrative is that having an abortion is a right, a form of healthcare, or even self-care. That idea is based on the wrong premise, however. It’s making a decision as though the only one involved is you.

“I made a terrible mistake and I will never forgive myself. I killed an innocent child. My child. I wish I was educated and I wish someone would have offered their support. I wish to God I would have looked at that sonogram and then jumped off the table and ran out as fast as I could. It’s been 20 years and the shame and guilt and heartache only gets worse. I’m so sorry sweet baby.”⁵

“…I was so naive that I thought my [baby] at 10 weeks…was just a‘dot.’I know it sounds absurd, but I really believed that. When the abortion was over, the doctor left the container by the side where I could see it. I was freaked out. It wasn’t a‘dot.’ Why didn’t Planned Parenthood explain more to me? God, I’ve been in hell for 40 years.”⁵

If you have gone through this experience and feel the heavy weight of regret and shame of that decision, then this message is for you: God doesn’t hate you.

In fact, He never stopped loving you, and longs for you to give that burden to Him to let Him carry it. Maybe you knew deep down that something was wrong in the first place, but felt that you had no choice but to go through with the procedure because of the circumstances you found yourself in. Perhaps you were too young, naive, poor, guilty or ashamed, unsupported or ill-equipped. No matter the reason, if the weight of the irreversible decision of having an abortion has crushed your spirit and caused near unbearable shame, then God wants to relieve you of this painful burden.

You may feel lied to, even betrayed, by the healthcare system or loved ones that were supposed to be a better support than they were. Though they may have let you down, God will not. He has the capability to redeem any decision you have made. You can rest in the knowledge that,“…by His wounds your wounds have been healed”and are therefore forgiven and saved from your sins if you believe in Jesus and surrender to Him.⁶

Finally, you can be encouraged that in the end, “He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.”⁷

Whatever has happened in your life that you think is so unforgivable, it is simply not true. God is still here for you, wanting you to come out of hiding so an intimate relationship with Him can be restored.