Overwhelmed By Decisions

GOD’S SPECIFIC PLAN AN OUT OUR ROLE LIVING IT

What should I eat for breakfast? How am I going to spend my Friday night? Where should I live? Should I go to church? Which church? Who should I marry? Should I even get married? Am I in the right major? Which job should I take? If you feel like your head is more full of “what-if’s” and “now-what’s” than it is full of clarity, you’re not alone. Columbia Business School professor Sheena Iyengar did a survey of 2,000 Americans and learned that the average number of choices made throughout a typical day was about 70.¹ She also conducted an experiment using jam displays in a grocery store that demonstrated that we’re easily overwhelmed when presented with too many choices. When people saw six varieties of jam, they stopped less often to investigate, but also bought a jar six times more often than when there was a display of 24 varieties of jam.¹ Talk about a real “jam” in our decision-making process!

HOW WE MAKE DECISIONS

When facing a decision, people often do one of two things. Some make decisions with little thought at all. In haste, we can end up making rash decisions we come to regret later. Making quick decisions also doesn’t leave time to consider how our decisions affect the people around us. Quickly making decisions seems like a nice idea in the short term because it makes us feel confident and in control, but ignoring the consequences of our actions generally leads to nothing good. Your parents may have warned you about this, and we’d venture to say they were probably right on this one.

On the other end of the spectrum are people who feel that decision-making can be paralyzing. Because it feels so overwhelming, there’s a tendency to turn on the auto-pilot, go about their days without thinking too deeply, and hope for the best. Even when the urgency of a decision is recognized, they can be afraid to make the wrong choice and just freeze up. If they’re not careful, they can spend weeks, months, and even years waiting for a clear answer.

The problem is, when we refuse to make committed decisions in our lives, nothing gets done. Months go by, and one day, a nagging discontentment has caught up with us. We may end up feeling bitter towards the way things are because our lives aren’t the way we hoped they’d be. Sometimes life doesn’t go the way we thought it would because of circumstances out of our control. Sometimes though, life isn’t what we hoped because of our own negligence. When we were given an option to act, we chose not to. The good news? In the middle of our decision paralysis, God is holding out the sweet promise of Jeremiah 29:11 (ESV), which says, “I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.”

A GOOD GOD

I remember being a high school senior and talking with my parents one night about which college I should go to. I had the choice narrowed down to two when my dad suggested I pick the university closer to home. It seemed like a good enough deciding factor, and a few months later, there I was as a first-year college student. While I am happy with my choice of university, I was not searching to know God during this time in my life, and because of that, I made decisions based solely on logic, what I wanted, and whatever was convenient for me. Until we realize our need for God’s direction in our lives, we will make decisions based on whatever feels right at the moment. The Old Testament tells of a time, not unlike today, where “everyone did what was right in his own eyes” (Judges 21:25, NKJV).  They left God out of the picture altogether and did what they wanted. Keep in mind that these were people who knew God, yet they chose to do what they deemed right instead of following what He determined was the way to go.

Part of making wise decisions is accepting that, in many cases, we don’t know what’s best for us. God says in Isaiah 55:8 (NKJV), “For My thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways My ways.” It’s no secret that we are mortal, with a start and end date. Our sight is limited to the moment we have right now. We don’t know what the next 60 seconds will hold. When you think about it, following God because He knows the future is the best thing we can do.

How awesome it is to follow a God that knows exactly what you should be doing every moment of every day! That gives true purpose. Living out the plans God talks about in Jeremiah gives us the deepest sense of belonging we can possibly imagine. If you’ve ever experienced it, there’s nothing quite like knowing you are exactly where you are supposed to be. The summer after my sophomore year of college, I knew God was asking me to stay in my college town for the summer so I could be more involved in my local church community there. My parents weren’t expecting this, but I shared what I felt God wanted for my summer. Deciding to stay was one of the tougher decisions I had made up until then because I would have rather been comfortable at home. Plus, it’s what my parents wanted, but both of these factors were in direct conflict with what God was asking me to do. Looking back now, I see how making that decision taught me about the importance of relying on the Holy Spirit for peace and looking to the Bible and my local church community for guidance. When we are in God’s will, we can rest because we are where God wants us to be, doing what He wants us to do. We’re no longer toiling over what God’s will is. Instead, we’re actually experiencing what it means to take a risk and trust God with the outcome.

Six years later, I am still in that college town living a life full of rich friendships and experiencing the love and power of God. The uncomfortable moments of tough decisions I went through to get here are all worth it now. The discomfort of going against what other people expect of me, or even how I feel about it, are powerless when I am obedient to God’s will because I trust that He is good and knows what He’s doing. Seeking God’s plan brings freedom from seeking to please other people. Paul talks about this in his letter to the churches of Galatia by asking himself, “Am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ” (Galatians 1:10, ESV).

MAKING WISE DECISIONS

As Christians, we can find some consolation in our decision-making when we remember they are opportunities to trust God. Many of us incorrectly assume God is asking us to guess at His will as if we are supposed to determine the future. This isn’t the case. In his book, Just Do Something: A Liberating Approach to Finding God’s Will, Kevin DeYoung puts it this way: “God is not a magic 8-ball we shake up and peer into whenever we have a decision to make. He is a good God who gives us brains, shows us the way of obedience, and invites us to take risks for Him.” God, in His faithfulness, has given us the tools we need to make decisions wisely as we navigate through our lives.

The Bible

As our Creator, the Bible says God is eternal which means He is outside of time and can see the full plan ahead. While it is not our job to see the big picture, God does want us to take steps forward to act on the commands He has already given us in His Word. In Malachi 3:6 (NKJV), God says, “For I am the Lord, I do not change.” That means that what the Word of God says applies to our lives today, and His commands have not wavered. God has laid out commands for all Christians to obey. For instance, we’re to love one another (John 13:34), bear one another’s burdens (Galatians 6:2), and make disciples (Matthew 28:19). Even if we’re not faced with any big life decisions at the moment, we can read what God has already asked us to do and start there.

Prayer

In the book of Philippians, God says, “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:6-7, NKJV). We begin to make wise decisions by bringing the options we see to God in prayer. We can be confident He wants to hear about our decisions and lead us as we take a step forward.

Community

God commands His people to be a part of a local body of believers. Having other people in your life who know you well and are also hearing from God is essential to your decision-making. The local church is a multi-generational family where there are others who have gone through similar life situations. They may have practical or spiritual guidance for you as you make your decisions.

“God is not a magic 8-ball we shake up and peer into whenever we have a decision to make. He is a good God who gives us brains, shows us the way of obedience, and invites us to take risks for Him.”

– Kevin DeYoung
 

FAITHFUL IN THE SMALL THINGS

God says in His Word in Luke 16:10 (NLT), “If you are faithful in little things, you will be faithful in large ones. But if you are dishonest in little things, you won’t be honest with greater responsibilities.” This verse doesn’t mean you’ll be presented with jaw-dropping opportunities because you’re doing well with what you’ve been given right now. What God is saying here is that the way we follow through on what we have right in front of us determines how we will respond with what we are given in the future. When we are in close relationship with God and are obedient to Him in the “little things,” we are training our ears to better listen to God’s voice when faced with bigger life decisions.

The pressure of the world makes you feel like you need to do a million different things. The truth is, you can’t say yes to everything and live the life God has planned for you. But we don’t have to fear missing out on anything either because there’s freedom in living the specific life God wants you to live. To combat your tendency to try and scoop up everything life has to offer, spend some time evaluating what your priorities are and how you’ve been spending your time. How are you doing with what you’ve been given right now? We honor God by being faithful and consistent in our day-to-day lives.

When faced with the next big life decision, follow the peace you’ve gained from being faithful to God in the little things and by being in close relationship with Him. Pray and take a step forward in faith because, without faith, it is impossible to please God (Hebrews 11:6). Remember that God is not hiding His will behind His back to keep it from you. His Word tells us, “God is not the author of confusion but of peace” (1 Corinthians 14:33, NKJV), and that “God has given us everything we need for living a godly life” (2 Peter 1:3, NLT).